Dope Rode Alone

https://soundcloud.com/mister-ampersand/dope-rode-alone

DOPE RODE ALONE

so sick of 'em stick-it-in-'em-feelings
I can't last hit-- for shit--
sittin' in it til brighter days
I ain't creatin' 'em
google search a better way
painin' til my paint is raised
acceptin' games-- 9 outta ten? huh?
ain't it always the way? ugh

wage slaves waive their days away
weighing savings over playing seems plain insane
I creep wave sagely
but I play to lose, baby
the buy more wards bore
gankin' up your bot lane
banelings in your gateways

employment--
call it nickel-and-dime-time
cutting down your life line
it's all a ploy, man--
I ain't got the fuckin' time--
I ain't got the time
to waste in an office space
I ain't got the patience
to prey on bigger paychecks
sacrificin' my everyday
that way's... a mistake, right?

a lonely place of dancing

a lonely place of dancing--
with only the statues
of the gods to keep you--

watching, waiting, silently--
footfalls echo, ignored,
on ears of concrete bored--

here is where you live, alone,
a solitary throne--
your cell you call your own--

a lonely place of playing--
wistful clouds, memories,
float by you, absently--

hurried bubbles-- thoughts! ideas!
quiver around your feet--
burst all-too-easily--

a lonely place of respite
quite suited to your tastes--

a fact too hard to face:

through stained-glass windows you watch
others dance in other halls
that you can't reach at all.

and so it begins / evil genius

and so it begins
with an uneven tooth-filled grin

an angry hand clenched
in a clawed gesture-- eyes focused

sniggering jester
blood soaked-- heart stopped-- my masterstroke

I must confess it's...
a bit of a mess, a pool

of blood congealing
and she's drowning, she's drowning

in it-- she's finished
a pawn spent- is victory gained

sacrifices
always cause pain

drowning down
bodies rising to the surface

--

so much meh on this one. Perhaps I'll revisit it when I've more to say

and your

hips &
lips &
thighs &
sighs &
winks &
kinks &...

and how
your hands
entwine
in mine

you're mine
and how
you're mine.

fresh scars and open sores

behind her hair lies her eyes
cat scratches on skinny thighs
what happened on that night
I don't know

she isn't telling me
through the fillings in her teeth
and if she's faking shrill glee
I don't know

fresh scars and open sores
all I know is all I saw.

Good-bye is a lie;

Good-bye is a lie;
for there is nothing good about it--
at the end of Sunday
you drove away, &
instead of smiling I pouted.

You're gone-- yet still linger in my room--
the scent of your hair
etched in the air--
"Damn weekend's over too soon!"

I miss you, Ms. You--
do you? Do
you love me, lovely,
as I do you.

poem for natasha

we fell
down the same well
and holding each other
we sang, as two
the songs that we knew
my pale bruised-peach lover

Tomorrow

Tomorrow, tomorrow
what a word, what a word
there's no sweeter a word
in all of the world.

Tomorrow, tomorrow
when my life starts anew--
O the things I'll get done!
O the things I'll do!

Tomorrow, tomorrow
not today! Not tonight!
The time isn't perfect
my mood isn't right!

Tomorrow! Tomorrow!
Tomorrow! Don't you see?
Tomorrow is when I'll
be all I can be.

Tomorrow, tomorrow
such a nice word to say
if-- I'm tired tomorrow
there's always the next day.

the wanderer

let's get stoned
and happy
and wonder why--

we hold our breath
when those girls
wander by

up all night
just to see
na'vi vs. NoTide

the world's out there
I'm happy
here inside

decisions,
decisions,
fingers conjoin

heads-- no-- tails-- yes--
--says the coin
oh the coin...

feels alright
waking up
to friday night

I let myself
get behind
sometimes...

Wearily.txt

I'm bored, and lost. And tired
My dates have all expired
I just sit. And nod my head
And play video games.

Ignored. Exhale and brood
In a filthy mood
The Lounging Dead
is my name.

Slam jazz piano chords
the coin-- of its own accord
cuts my way every day.

old text files

exhaling thoughts
lost inside dreams
imagination
bursts life's grey seams--

inhaling ash
lost in myself
masturbation
behind the shelf

my world window
shows far away stars--
they twinkle, I think
as light through bars

pixellated
eyes-crinkled smiles
the ghost of you
lingers...
in old text files.

Lost Again

and here I paint
upon my pedestal
ain't I quaint
am I the fool

and here I tap
on blackened keys
burnt fingers sap
my mind of ease

empty vessels
and laziness
unwinding spools
of endless rest

in dying machines
animated corpses
dance, along the seams
with purpose--

lost again
nostalgia

ethereal
the e-real

I play my role
dance my part and wear my masks
you pay my toll
too wise to ask

two and four and blue
and black and white and gray
is no more to you
than all I have to say

waves break upon the shore
as I sail these seas
I see
I speak with more Is than ease

summer girls

Summer girls
in summer clothes
in summer
girls come and go

I Don't Get It

www.gatheryourparty.com/articles/2013/01/16/i-dont-get-it/